THE RAIN

It has done little but rain for this last week, it has pissed it down at every available opportunity and the ground is soaked. The sun has gone on holiday, there is nothing but cloud in the sky and any vestige of blue is quickly swallowed up by yet more cloud and further rainfall. it’s not so bad if you are a fish, but even then there is only so much water a river can hold. Then where do the fish end up… Further down stream or in the farmers field?

It’s not much fun being a gardener when it rains and even less so when you are working outside. Having a raincoat does not do much as you sweat, get too hot, take it off and get wet anyway. So you may as well get soaked and have a spare top which will get wet when you replace the sodden thing. Sitting in your van and out of the weather is not an option. You don’t get paid doing that, more than likely you will never get paid and won’t have any clients neither. Rain or no rain, lots of gardens or none, it is a good idea to have a back up plan. To know where you are going and you need something else to do when you are sick of digging up Delphiniums and cutting the heads off great masses of flowering Dandelions.

That last bit really pisses me off. People who use slug pellets and poisons also get my goat. Even more when they go on about how much they care for nature and the environment. Their electric cars and solar panels are but glitter on shit and is the worst kind of hypocrisy. I once put a curse on a clients slug pellets, it was a massive tub holding around 15 kg and I cursed it to be barren and neutral to all creatures. He was one of those people who claimed a love of nature, so long as it was not eating his carefully arranged garden full of non native species.

I do not particularly care for Slugs they are naked slimy things, snails give me far more pleasure. I do not harm either species, unless they accidentally get under my foot, in which case… It is not fun scraping Gastropod out from between ones toes, Ideally I need a Hedgehog or two to eat them all up. Ducks are good but shit a lot and require a fair amount of space to enjoy themselves in.